If we are asked what the most important thing in life is, dating and relationships are going to be the answer for so many people. It is human nature to seek relationships with others. Some may do it for fun and some do it to create a new life.
There are not many people in the world who can give better dating advice than top tier dating coaches. They are professionals possessing masterful skill in dating and flirting with all types of people. Not just that, they are best at interpersonal skills as well as philosophy and sociology.
Because of their knowledge, these dating coaches are well-known for bringing a successful dating life to their clients. As promised in our last interview with Hunt Ethridge, our dating coach for today's interview is Kezia Noble. She is a leading dating and attraction expert for men, and author of the bestselling book ‘The Noble Art Of Seducing Women’. As a founder and CEO of Kezia Noble (http://www.kezia-noble.com/), Kezia has helped over ONE MILLION men to become more successful with women.
Let's hear what she has to say about the life of a dating coach.
What life experience made you decide that you would like to be a dating coach?
My interest in social dynamics, mind management, confidence building and self-marketing are the main reasons for why I felt the role of a dating and attraction expert was the right for me, but also, I believe that my no-nonsense, direct and fiercely honest nature are facets of my character that lend well to giving advice to people who want REAL results as opposed to people who just want to hear ‘sugar coated encouragement that only serve to massage their egos.
What was your dating life like before you became a dating coach?
I dated a variety of men. From young to old. From poor to rich. From clowns to intellectuals. It’s this variety that essentially makes me a good attraction coach. I don’t pay too much attention on ‘types’. My prime focus is on ‘game’ which can transcend through any ‘specific types’. These days I’m far more aware when someone is nervous, when someone has inner confidence rather than a fake brashness. I’ve become more alert to the telltale signs compared to before I become a dating expert.
How does being a dating coach affect your own love life? Do you apply the same rules and matching techniques to your own dating habits?
I certainly do apply my own advice to my dating life. It’s extremely difficult to resist the temptation to text a guy I like straight back, or to put someone I desire in cold storage, but I know these kinds of tactics, as infantile as they may at first seem, really do produce strong results. Being a mother of a small child, it makes the dating game even more tricky, but I’m having fun experimenting with this particular situation.
What is the most important thing when giving relationship advice to your client?
I always tell my clients that they need to keep focusing time and energy on things going on outside of the relationship. We love the idea of being the prime focus of someone’s attention but in reality it can be extremely overwhelming, and dare I say it, a little needy. You always need to keep up with your hobbies, interests and social life. Otherwise, your partner could become a little complacent and bored. Always remember what it was that made them attracted to you in the first place too.
What is the most asked question from your client? And why?
How do I stop getting friend zoned? This is the result of two very common sticking points, which are coming across as too much of a Mr Nice Guy and not being able to flirt or sexually escalate the interaction/relationship. Staying in the Friend-zone is a frustrating experience but many people subconsciously choose it because it’s also a safe zone.
Do you have some requirements for your clients?
Only that they do as they're told, if they start mixing my advice with friends advice then the process will take a lot longer, and conflicting opinions can confuse my clients and result in them giving up all together.
Is there a universal strategy that works for all dating advices?
Yes, a man or woman must first make sure the person they like respects them. Without respect there can’t be any real attraction.
Is there a specific trait that prevents someone from having a successful relation?
Yes, it’s not having the confidence or ‘know how’ to escalate the relationship into the direction they wish it to go. Whether that means making bold first move to actually approach someone in the first place or taking incremental steps within the interaction to take it to the next phase.
How have apps such as Tinder and online dating sites changed the way of dating?
It has affected peoples social skills quite a lot. People spend a great deal of time on perfecting their profiles and messages in order to convey cool, confident and charismatic personas, and believe that 80% of the job is getting the other person to agree to meet. In actual fact, that’s probably the easiest part! The hard part is being consistent with that online persona when you both meet in real life.
If there’s one piece of advice you’d have for singles who are looking for a partner, what would it be?
Make dating just an extra part of your life rather than your entire life. People can pick up on desperation from miles away. No one wants to be with the person who is obsessed on finding ‘the one’. We want someone who has an active social life, interests, hobbies and passions and a contentment that is not ultimately governed or determined by whether they find someone or not. Now that’s attractive!
We would like to end an interview with Kezia's dating advice video on YouTube that is currently having over 5 million views "how to make her want you".
Our dating coach interview does not end here. Check back our blog next week and read the dating and relationship advice from the Seattle dating coach with Alter Ego concept, Marina Lavochin.